Monday, November 1, 2010

Open my heart.

If you have been following my blog or know me in a personal level.
  I love November.
November is National Adoption Month. 
I hope one day that "Hub's" and I become Parents. 
We have to much love to give to a baby not to have one.
Try hard to remember circumstances that the hurt of infertility vary. 

Infertility may result from a health condition on the part of either or both spouses. 
Many times couples become infertile after they already have a child.
Many just can't become Pregnant.
My story is that from the time I got "aunt flow" 
I had the worst time, 
my highschool years were almost always spent in bed,
I had a number of DNC's and Laparoscopy.  
Only to end up down the path 6 months before my 20th Birthday
with a full hysterectomy.
I was never given the choice to freeze my eggs. 
At such a young age it would have changed the world and should have been done. 
I look back and that is my biggest regret.
Regardless, all deserve compassion and freedom from stereotypes.
 I try to hide it.
I hate baby showers, they cuts like a knife, in my heart.
A cut so deep that it takes me weeks sometimes months to recover from.
Knowing that I might never hold a baby of my own. 
    It isn't that I am not happy for the people that have babies. 
Don't not invite me to your baby shower.
 Or not have me be a part of your child's life.
That is not the point, I want to share with you.
I know that there are days its just to hard to be part of somethings.
Then there are days that are not hard at all. 

One day I will look into the eyes of my sweet little one and say, 
Not flesh of my flesh,
Nor bone of my bone,
but still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute;
You didn't grow under my heart
but in it. 

Just try to remember that some get to become a mom in easier ways then others.
Try to be soft and sensitive to the ones that its harder for. 
So if you are wanting to or wishing to adopt 
here are some links you might 
to try.